A BRITISH betting agency is encouraging Premier League players to perform the first sponsored goal celebration - offering $25,000 to any goalscorer who debuts the "Takai" from a scene in The Karate Kid movies. In a new low for football commercialisation, "every Premier League footballer, agent and club has been sent a step-by-step guide," it says. Sadly, too late for Manchester United's Eric "kung fu" Cantona, now retired. Robinho on the buses Manchester City's Brazilian star Robinho, who earns about $300,000 a week, has shocked the world by taking a bus to and from a recent shopping trip with his girlfriend. "He sat downstairs as if it was the most normal thing for a multimillionaire footballer to do," said one passenger. "Nobody quite believed it and some just stared open-mouthed."
Harry watches his pennies While Lucas Neill and Tim Cahill are hitching various-sized wagons to possible future A-League teams, one Socceroos heavyweight who will not be throwing money at the local league is Harry Kewell. Word from Harry HQ is the Galatasaray star has "absolutely no interest in any A- League team due to the financial crisis".
Dooks back in Toon Remember Mark Viduka ? He finally returned to training at Newcastle United, having not played a game since the end of last season. According to spies, "Dooks" is refreshed and focused on the second half of the season after six months off. Newcastle fans hope history repeats. The occasional Socceroo always puts in superhuman season-saving performances after returning from injury when his contract nears end (check Leeds, Middlesbrough). "He's a top, top, player," Newcastle's stand-in boss Joe Kinnear said. "We've waited so long for him to come back."
Vangelis sadly out of tune Just why is Italian football so special? Bologna defender Vangelis Moras ran to his team's supporters after last weekend's 1-1 result with Siena, celebrating the draw (ha!) by throwing his shirt into the crowd. It was thrown straight back. "I am very upset and disappointed," moped Moras. "I had never seen anything like it. It's a great shame as today's result was very important for us."
Friends, Romans … Rome's Olympic Stadium fell silent for the first five minutes of last weekend's derby between Roma and Lazio. The reason? It's a year since Lazio fan Gabriele Sandri was shot dead by cops while sleeping in the back of a car. Both sets of fans chanted "Justice for Gabriele". > FANS IN A HURRY A quick word with… Cristiano Ronaldo, on his chances for the coming FIFA World Player of the Year title: "I am the first, second, and third-best player in the world. I think that I did everything that is necessary to win and I am going to continue doing more."
Friendly about-turn After declaring friendly matches "meaningless", England's media claimed the 2-1 win over Germany was "a result to be treasured", "brimmed with significance" and (wait for it), a "Triumph!" >SNUB OF GOD Brazilian nuts If John Kosmina ever feels life's tough in the A-League, consider Brazil. Palmeiras coach Vanderlei Luxemburgo , with spells as Brazil's national coach and at Real Madrid on his CV, had his arm broken by disgruntled fans last weekend. FORMER Sydney coach Terry Butcher , now assistant with Scotland's national team, spent last week moaning he'd "never forgive" Diego Maradona for what he did at the 1986 World Cup. No, not making a fool of the former England defender while scoring the greatest goal ever, but for the "Hand of God" goal in the same game. Asked after Argentina beat Scotland last week if he'd shaken Butcher's hand, Maradona responded: "Who is Butcher?" Ouch. SIXTY River Plate supporters in Buenos Aires hijacked a bus and demanded its driver speed across the Argentine capital in time for kick-off. Hopefully, Sydney FC Fans are more sensible.
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